Day 3

Isaiah 6:1-8
In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord seated on a throne, high and exalted, and the train of his robe filled the temple. Above him were seraphs, each with six wings: With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying. And they were calling to one another:
"Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty; the whole earth is full of his glory."
At the sound of their voices the doorposts and thresholds shook and the temple was filled with smoke.
"Woe to me!" I cried. "I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the LORD Almighty."
Then one of the seraphs flew to me with a live coal in his hand, which he had taken with tongs from the altar. With it he touched my mouth and said, "See, this has touched your lips; your guilt is taken away and your sin atoned for."
Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?"
And I said, "Here am I. Send me!"

When face to face with God the first thing out of Isaiah's mouth is "woe to me." By the end of this encounter he is saying "send me." The transformation from woe to me to send me was painful for Isaiah. The angel used a hot coal and touched it to his mouth. I don't know about you, but my idea of a good time is not putting a coal to my mouth. Usually a good time for me includes doing anything I can to stay away from hot things, even spicy foods. It is painful to change, it is painful when God changes you. To go from what is comfortable - no matter how harmful - to the unknown. I think that is what I struggle with the most. Not change, but the unknown . . . even when the place where I am comfortable is damaging to me. I built me a few walls, put down some carpet, got a Lazy Boy, and started hanging out inside that room. I don't let people in, and I rarely come out. It is comfortable, but not healthy. Over the last few months I have been going out more, letting a few people inside (even if it is only for a few minutes), and trying to make my best effort to make that change. I don't really know what my life will look like on the other side - but I do know that trip is painful. The pain comes from the past, from the moving of muscles I have never really used (like my heart), from the worry of the unknown, and from the burning away of things that held me back.